Which is pretty much how all my relationships with men are conducted... But I digress. After watching Gok Wan's all new Fashion Fix last night, I admit I find Gok this weird combination of adoring women in all shapes and sizes, being a friend, a counsellor, celebrating the female form in all it's natural glory, showing us how we can make the most of ourselves with the best make up and high street fashion, etc, etc, and then, hosing us down in a pool like a form of ritual humiliation.
I simply cannot decide if he's the best thing to happen to womankind since the mini skirt or if, in fact, it's more extreme sexism sugar coated in pink empowerment. I mean, I'm sure there was a time being called a bootlicious babe was considered degrading. And why do we need a gay man to dress us up in tortuous high heels and uber skinny 'I can't breathe' belts to feel good anyway? Isn't this just how fashion has always been? Why is Gok seen as someone so revolutionary?
But it's not really just the suggestion of sexism that kind of narks me so much, I mean, you just need to read my blog a bit to see that I quite like tortuous high heels and 'I can't breathe' belts. That I do believe dressing well is a sure fire way to feel good, powerful and shows self-respect.
What really pisses me off about Gok's hypercritical Fashion Fix, is the price.
In his catwalk off with the designer beauties, Gok is out to prove that high street can look as good as expensive designer. Not only does he lose (well, when you have spent £30,000, the clothes better look bloody good) he picks up a £39 plain white shirt and irons things onto it. Erm, does anyone else think that £39 for a white shirt is cheap? Would anyone else dare to ruin said shirt by ironing things onto it? When I buy white shirts I pick up two for £20 from Dotty P.
When Gok pulls out Karen Millen saying this is high street I think: 'oh, god, I always considered her designer.' I was so proud of the £135 Karen Millen pinstripe shirt dress that hung in my wardrobe. I honestly considered it the closest I would ever get to D&G. This depresses me.
One of his 'high street bargain' outfits costs a whopping £300! For ONE outfit?! F@!K
In many ways I do commend Gok for trying. I commend him for being likeable, fun and full of a personality that makes others feel good. I do like his style, I have admittedly 'Goked up' an old dress to give it a new lease of life. But this is an old dress, that belonged to my sister before me. I would never 'Gok up' and potentially ruin something I have just spent my precious pounds on. How much does he think we all earn?! Is he aware of the recession?! I just don't think he goes far enough. When I buy clothes from high end high street like River Island and Zara I consider myself treated and usually feel a little guilty. Gok needs to start visiting Primark, New Look, Matalan! Only then can he say things like 'We have to stop shopping and start wearing,' and ranting on about all the clothes we waste. A £300 outfit a bargain. As if.
I do think his capsule wardrobe is a good idea, 24 pieces that you can mix and match but, well, this is kind of how I and any normal woman who pays her own bills dresses anyway! Besides, I was bored of the wardrobe by the end of his one hour programme.
And therein' lies Gok's dilemma. Nice clothes are expensive and fashionista types like myself need constant reinvention. A capsule wardrobe will keep me happy for oh, five minutes.
We have three solutions:
a) Stay poor,
b) find a rich man/make loads of money
c) get over your addiction.
However, I can't see option c making very good telly.
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