The inability to stop daydreaming.

A few weeks back I wrote a post about giving up daydreaming. So I thought I would write a little update on how I'm doing with the, well, you know, not daydreaming...

It can't be done.

Seriously, it's totally impossible. 

Although, I've not been daydreaming at work and getting to bed on time a lot more and making it to the gym earlier, all of which are positives. But you can't change the habits of a lifetime in just a few weeks and Ryan Reynolds is too strong a pull to resist for 20 minutes at 6.10pm on the tube. 

I chatted with a friend about this (the inability to stop daydreaming that is, not Ryan Reynolds centered fantasies) and as I've never been one to sleep well she suggested that perhaps daydreaming is the way my brain rests. 

That and it really does cheer me up after a stressful day. 

Thus, I shall reach a compromise. I shall accept that daydreaming is just part of who I am and this will never change but I will try very hard to not daydream in the below situations:

1) At work

2) When I should be down the gym (perfectly fine to daydream while I'm at the gym, helps the time go by in a much more pleasurable manner)

3) When visiting my parents (they deserve my full attention!)

4) When out and chatting to friends (as above)

5) When I'm on a date and meant to be focusing on what the man is saying (insensitive to be daydreaming about Mr Reynolds or Mr Depp at this point really) 

6) When I should be going to bed

7) When I should be having a post run shower (I know, I'm disgusting)

8) When I should be cleaning the kitchen/bathroom/sweeping the living room floor

9) When I'm already running late to meet someone and shouldn't really be making myself later... 

Oooh, Johnny and Ryan, without shirts but with chocolate brownies that don't make you fat. 

Whoops. What can I say, the place in my head is just a nicer place to be.

Giving up my largest vice.

When I was younger I did one of those quizzes in a magazine that determines what kind of personality you are. Obviously such quizzes are often a load of generalised rubbish but this one got me spot on. It said I was one of life's dreamers. Always got my head in the clouds in a world of fantasy.
I live in a little fantasy world a lot more than I live in reality. (N.B I am able to tell the difference between my little fantasy world and reality - I don't have a personality disorder, I assure you all!). I can't even begin to imagine the hours upon hours upon hours of my life I have spent day dreaming. It's my greatest pursuit, my largest vice.
My very vivid and extensive imagination does have some plus points. I can write a silly story at the drop of a hat, I think very creatively at work, I'm more fun to be around as I have a very particular silly outlook on the world. Also, it's a great survival technique, something that keeps me cheerful. If I'm having a crap day I can just day dream about shoes and/or sex for a while and then I feel much better.
However, constant day dreaming has many negatives. A sheer lack of productivity is certainly one of the worst aspects of being a daydreamer. For example, it can be super busy at work, I'm working really hard and then Ryan Reynolds sans shirt chained to the floor a'la that famous scene in Blade pops in my head. Next thing I know, an hour has passed... in reality I have done little more than stare at a spreadsheet but in my fantasy world Ryan and I have met, fallen madly in love, married and he re-enacts that scene for my personal pleasure on a daily basis. Or, I've just got home from a really good night out with my girl mates. I should be going to bed and getting some sleep but I put some music on, lay on my bed and imagine all the amazing holidays and shopping trips me and my girlie mates could go on if I won a million quid on the lottery. Next thing I know, it's nearly two in the morning and I need to be up at 7am. I have lost many a weekend dancing round my house to music and imagining I'm a world famous jazz singer. I read an article recently that people tweeting all the time means they are now easily distracted from life's tasks. I never needed twitter to be distracted - my little fantasy land always did that for me.
Although my daydreaming has made me quite ambitious, as I'm always dreaming about the next big step, the next big thing. I worry that this means I will never be happy or content with my lot. I mean, it's hardly as if my daydreams are rooted in any achievable reality. I don't buy lottery tickets so it's pretty much impossible for me to win, I'm never going to become a world famous jazz singer due to the fact that I suffer from stage fright and it's not as if Ryan Reynolds lives down the road (sad times that). Constant day dreaming means that sometimes I don't appreciate the great things I have achieved and the amazingness of reality!
So, for one week, I have decided to instill some discipline to my head and give up day dreaming. I know this will not be easy. I gave up chewing pens just by putting nail biting solution on them but, as a former colleague pointed out to me, there is no nail biting solution for the brain.
Here are my rules for this week:
1) No music unless I'm doing something. I.e. right now, I have some music on but I'm writing so that's ok. But laying on my bed and putting music on is a no no. It's a sure fire way to day dream and no sleep at all land.
2) I shall have a daydream allowance. Twice a day I walk about twenty minutes to and from work. I have to make this walk so here is where I am allowed to let my brain go mental and have a good day dream to get it out of my system.
3) Instead of listening to my Ipod and daydreaming on the tube I will always read my book no matter how crowded it is. I shall read when I'm waiting for the tube as well.
4) If I start to daydream I shall stop and do something productive.
5) Every day I shall appreciate all the good things about my reality.

New Years Resolutions. N.B. this isn't fiction.

It's that time of year again!
Yesterday out of interest I had a look at my resolutions for last year. Then, I had a good think about how much I have achieved.
Resolutions 1 & 2) Pay off overdraft, improve finances and approach to money.
I have completely paid off my overdraft and, wait for it, wait for it... have savings to the tune of £800! I have very much changed the way I approach money. In fact yesterday, I was in a shop and there was a lovely pair of red peeptoes on sale for £30 and a similarly lovely pair of nude peeptoes for £35. I walked out of the shop without buying either, reasoning with myself that I already owned three red pairs of shoes and a nude pair I never wore enough anyway.
Resolution 3) Improve my punctuation.
I'm sure it will never be my strongest point, but in the summer this year, I did have a meeting with my previous boss and he said he felt my punctuation was much improved. Hurrah hurrah hurrah.
Resolution 4) Get back to a healthier way of living.
I will go to the gym after work and then not have any sweets at the cinema. I will, I will, I will!
Resolution 5) Start being more crafty and making my own clothes, chutney and jam.
Errrrm, what?!
Resolution 6) Get better at web design.
Marginally improved. I think my site does look prettier. Probably can't be bothered to make it any better. 

And then we go to that sneaky bit at the bottom about about being a dignified lady and handling the menfolk better... well, it's safe to say that the money issue is where I have really excelled this year!

And so to my resolutions for 2011. Every year I make resolutions about money and health and to be honest, I will always try to improve myself in this way New Years Resolution or not, so for 2011 I have decided to take a different course:

1) Stop putting so much pressure on myself because I always do my very best anyway.
2) Like and accept myself for who and what I am, because I do quite well and am quite nice really.
3) Show more kindness to others, especially the homeless.
4) Stop getting into debates with people. It only gets you feeling wound up and upset.

So, it's 2010 and I have a New Years resolution or two...

1) Pay off my overdraft (currently only £526 overdrawn so I have high hopes for this one! And yes, I had this one last year, but at the beginning of last year my overdraft was nearer to the £3,000 mark so I feel I have done rather well.) 
2) Improve my finances generally and change the way I spend money.
3) Improve my punctuation.
4) Get back to a more healthier way of living.
5) Start being a bit more crafty, making my own clothes, making jam and chutney, etc (I bet you lot are well excited about your birthday presents now aren't you?!)
6) Get better at this web design thing.

And there are some others, generally about being a more dignified lady (especially at parties) and some other stuff about handling the menfolk better. But that's all a bit too personal to go into here.

So, what are everyone else's New Years resolutions?

Before Christmas, how things in my life are progressing...

Overdraft total = £914. Not bad but nowhere near target. But aside from a little indiscretion in Primark last weekend I really have been very good. New target is by end of March at the very latest.
Health = I have been suffering from a cold for a week (a whole week! Unheard of in my land), I have eaten my entire weight in Quality Street (in fact, I reckon I look like a Quality Street right now) and I have done sod all exercise for a fortnight. I am going to become fat and spotty and horrendous.
Crafty/web design progress = I have made nothing and I have learnt nothing new about how to web design.
Improving punctutuation = Errrrrrm...
Lovelife = I refuse to answer this.
Job = Actually going quite well! However, just one hour and 39 minutes and then I won't have to worry about that for a whole week and a half. WOO HOO!

On day five, five ways in which I have started to get my life together...

1) I got paid yesterday and put a whole hunk of cash into my overdraft. I am now only £749.52 overdrawn. Not so bad!
2) I have got my mits on a hula hoop (for free) and tonight plan to hula hoop my stomach into oblivion.
3) This morning I did half an hour of yoga instead of being a lazy arse in bed.
4) I actually bothered to shave my legs
5) This lunchtime, I got all my food for the week and spent a tiny weeny £9.33. Tonight I shall make a recipe from the World Cancer Research Fund's budget bites cook book: Salmon pasta bake, which should last me four meals. If it's good, I'll post the recipe tomorrow.

Looking to the future...

I have a small confession to make.
I am not doing as well at the whole paying off my debts thing as I had previously stated. In fact, I haven't even looked at my overdraft for a fortnight because I'm really scared that all my hard work will have evaporated into dust/been given to all the shops on Oxford Street.
I blame Christmas. I was doing alright, I swear financial guru, I really was. I was following your well thought out plan, I was saving money, it was torture, but it was tolerable torture and I was doing ok.
Then I went to Westfield. My mum took me to buy me a coat for Christmas. Then I planned to put the rest of my Christmas money into my overdraft. Yes, you read right, I planned to put Christmas money into my overdraft. HA! Have I met myself for fuck sake? At the end of the day laden with bags I had spent every penny. And you know what? It was damn worth it. I really did need a faux fur coat, a jumper with a tiger sequinned on the front, a black knit jumper dress, a floral clutch bag, two shirts, two round neck black T-shirts, a black and gold suede belt and a floral scarf, I really did! I was on such a high when I got home. The shopping had made me quite drunk. And then I went crazy and spent fuckloads of money on Oxford street, Spitalfields Market and drinking rum in a bar. And then I went to buy a perfume and ended up buying three because I couldn't decide which smell I liked best and they were on a 3 for 2 deal. It was at that point I knew it had all gone hazardously wrong.
Not only is my cash situation a problem, I have to admit something else. I haven't been very healthy lately. In fact, I have been a total carboholic who hasn't worked out for a week or two (it's been so cold in the mornings!) and my hard worked for abdominal muscles are well, jellified. And I'm getting quite spotty. If this is what stuffed pasta does to your skin I'm not so sure it's much of a comfort food anymore.
So, it's about time I stop being a lazy moany cow and get my life in order. And I am going to be a bit more crafty (A great way to save money I'm told). And more web savvy. This is the third blog I've had and I still can't work out how to create hyperlinks. Oh and I've been a journalist and a PR for four years, I've got a first class degree and I still can't use apostrophes. So any punctuation tips would be good too.
So, this is no longer a blog bemoaning my lack of money, this is no longer a blog lusting after things I can't afford (but if you still want to read that, you can go to my simpleblog http://www.sartorialpervert.posterous.com/) this is a turn my life around blog, a postive improve myself blog. Where I will share my hints, tips, recipes and ideas to make me a better person. A person who does things rather than buys things. I have 365 days, starting from tomorrow, to get my act together. This time next year I will be a far richer, craftier, web savier, healthier, better punctuated woman.
I just need your ideas! So please send them to me at ginger_princess365@yahoo.co.uk and I'll make sure I feature as much as I can.
And going back to the overdraft. Right, time to be brave. Let's have a look: £1,137.60 Oh shit fuck shit rubbish fuck shit shit bugger. Worse than I thought. :(